We have decided to enroll mom in a hospice program. She is just not improving at all, and we really want to bring her home. The plan is to take care of everything this weekend and first thing Monday, so hopefully she will be home by Monday afternoon.
She is still sleeping all the time and won't eat which could be a sign that her body is just shutting down and the end is near. We still are clinging to our hope, but it isn't looking good.
It just takes me back to the initial diagnosis and back to the feelings of helplessness, anger, profound sadness....just 3 months ago, she was youthful, vibrant, energetic - so full of life. Now, she is all but gone. I can't bare it some moments.
We know that it is a TRUE BLESSING that she has absolutely no pain at the moment and can only hope that it remains that way.
I am off to the hospital. I guess we will be celebrating what could be mom's last mother's day in the hospital tomorrow morning. I don't think that black words spelled out on a white background can truly express just how profoundly sad that makes me and how broken my heart and spirit are right now!
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